Lonely

You make me feel so lonely sometimes

You have the potential to make or break me
and so often
I sit there, letting the feelings fester inside me, around my heart, leaving it hollow with its stirrings
but I never want to say anything
I don't want to seem pathetic, or needy or
and sometimes I just want you near
without prompting

some kind of proof of affection


your words hurt more than you know
already tired of me
and so the song repeats
and you won't understand


I keep screwing up, reversing things
shattering trust
making you afraid of me and the things I can do, the things I can break
I don't want to stop being a human in your eyes
I don't want
to lose you



and I can't solve this loneliness
because it isn't fair to you
I'm such a temptress
I should want nothing

.
something broke inside me today
smash
shatter
crash